Did you ever see a line that jumps out at you from the page or TV screen or your computer, and think, “That sentence doesn’t make sense!”
You also might have said, “I’m not a professional. If I noticed that goof instantly, why didn’t the writers/editors?”
We’re thinking the same thing.
Currier & Ives/Library of Congress
“The (Lincoln) memorial is located along the infamous National Mall along with The Washington Monument. It’s a very beautiful monument that’s well worth a visit.”
This blogger was so enthusiastic she forgot that infamous is not the same as famous. Lincoln: Famous. John Wilkes Booth: Infamous.“Emergency responders found victims -- including the third fatal person who died — in that building as well.” (Submitted by Dr. Baruch Kahana)
Fatal person who died?“Any pet that is noisy…will not be allowed to remain in the park.”
We covered this back in September 2021. You don’t allow, or forbid, a dog to do anything. It won’t listen. It’s a dog. Say, “If any pet is noisy…the owner will have to remove it from the park.”“I hope this letter finds you well.”
We talked in September 2023 about formality gone overboard. Yes. We hope someone finds us well! Better than “I hope this letter finds you dead somewhere in a ditch.” Wouldn’t you say? Also, an inanimate object — in this case a letter — can’t find anything.“Lufthansa points out that it entered the pandemic with a widebody fleet made up of 50% widebodies.” (Submitted by Dr. Baruch Kahana).
Only half your doughnuts are doughnuts? The horror!“Mother of convicted rapist found dead with 6 other people in Oklahoma is searching for answers.” (Submitted by Milt Baker.)
The writer of this unintelligible mess reposted it later with two critical words added, and then it made sense: “Mother of convicted rapist who was found dead with six other people in Oklahoma is searching for answers.” It’s still pretty unwieldy and begs a lot of questions. And "searching for answers” is a brutal cliché.(Congressman) might be one of the most controversial people in Washington, D.C., but there is no shortage of love for him in his home district of … A crowd of well over 100 people showed up at…”
In July 2022, we dealt with TV reporters somehow professing to know how an entire community feels. In this case, we go after a print reporter. A congressional district has 700,000 people. If 100 show up at a rally for a guy, how can a reporter make the leap that most of the 700,000 love him?…soldiers from the United States, South Korea, and local residents came together…”
We covered the maligned comma back in August 2021. Here’s what this writer just said:
Soldiers from the United States
Soldiers from South Korea
Soldiers from local residents
Correct: “…soldiers from the United States and South Korea, as well as local residents….” (P.S.: came together also is a brutal cliché.)“Boeing CEO apologizes for safety lapses at Senate hearing.”
The misplaced modifier! Like an old friend. Or old meat loaf.Homophobic.
We know this has become part of the lexicon. But it really isn’t right. It’s not. You know that “phobia” doesn’t mean “hate.” It means, “fear.” Now, some would argue that people who hate the LGBTQ+ movement for equality and dignity actually might be afraid of it. That’s for another day.“I’m more than happy to attend.”
How can you be more than happy? How does that work? Physically?
Watch this on video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNkotJDiQfk&t=36s
A unique note from the Horriby Wrong” team:
Readers: You know we've often slapped hands over very unique or most unique. Our argument was the definition of unique: one of a kind. How can you be very one?
"Horribly Wrong's" bible is the Associated Press Stylebook. In the spring of 2024, it announced it had partnered with the Merriam-Webster Dictionary and so would follow that tome's ruling that it was acceptable to describe something as very unique when the sense is highly unusual, rare, etc. It did say the obvious: Don't use very unique when the sense is one of a kind.
We've acknowledged that language is a living thing. We've noted that makes it vulnerable to mauling. That's how we ended up with funds in your fund, making an appointment for your appointment, and wondering if your train is stopping momentarily or momentarily.
Naturally, the "Horribly Wrong" team will aver to our gurus. But we note that this blog is about not just accuracy but clarity. Sure, you can do it now. But why not go one better? If something is really rare, say really rare. If it's one of a kind, save the wonderful unique for that. That's our advice.
.Next time: I don’t know, and I don’t care.
Readers: "Something Went Horribly Wrong" features samples of bad writing we see nearly every day. You can participate! Be our duly deputized “grammar police.” Your motto: “To protect and correct.” Send in your photos of store signs, street signs, menus, TV news graphics, newspaper headlines, tweets, and so on. It doesn’t have to be a grammatical error. It can be just what we call “cowardly writing.” Include your name and home town so we can credit you properly. You're free to add a comment, although we reserve the right to edit or omit. Now get out there! Send to Eliot@eliotkleinberg.com
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NOTE: Eliot and Lou Ann are available for speaking engagements, and can travel. Reach us through the comments section. Just think of all of your employees getting back to work on a Monday, their heads filled with all the ways we’ve shown them to be better communicators!