“England and America are two countries separated by a common language.” — Attributed to George Bernard Shaw
Eliot visited the United Kingdom in the summer of 2023. At Eilean Donan Castle in Scotland, he jokingly asked a man handing out guides, “Is this in American English?” The man said, with a straight face that hid a twinkle, “No. Proper English.”
During Eliot’s visit, he encountered — and photographed — many examples of people speaking differently than Americans. Why is that a surprise? There's different slang between Brooklyn and the Bronx!
Several years ago, Eliot grabbed an audiobook off the discount rack that turned out to be an unauthorized James Bond novel. In one scene, an American military guy briefed a group on some deadly mission. The British writer had the American speaking in British-ese! So a gruff G.I. Joe growled in an American accent, "Let's go, men. Grab your Macintoshes and toss them in your bonnets." Yes. It was bad. Writers: don’t make the same mistake. In one of Eliot's novels, his Miami detective meets with two British government officials. Eliot was terrified that, like the Ian Fleming wannabe, he'd inadvertently have the Brits talk like Americans. So he reached out to a British cousin to "translate" the dialogue.
We won’t attempt to tackle the other parts of the world whose denizens speak a different form of English (Put British and Texan accents in a blender, get Australian). And we won’t address the infuriating British (and Canadian!) habit of sticking a "u" in words such as color and honor, or switching an “s” for a “z.” How disorganised!. After all, as we explained in our March 28, 2021, segment, those are the real reasons for the American Revolution. Really. Look it up.
Here are some American terms and their British counterparts, from Spellzone and the British Club. Do your homework! Full stop!
Private school Public school
Public school State school
Raincoat Mackintosh
Umbrella Brolly
Round-trip ticket Return ticket
Lawyer Barrister or solicitor
Mailbox Postbox
Main street High street
For rent To let
Shopping cart Shopping trolley
Sled Sledge
Sneakers Trainers
Soccer Football
Football American football
Subway Underground or tube
Sweater Jumper
Takeout food Takeaway
Highway pulloff/rest area Layby
Traffic circle Roundabout
TV Telly
Vacation Holiday
Wrench Spanner
Yield Give way
ZIP code Postcode
Apartment Flat
Elevator Lift
Can Tin
Candy Sweets
Cookie or cracker Biscuit
Cell phone Mobile phone
Diaper Nappy
Dish towel Tea towel
Drugstore Chemist
Exit Way out
Expressway Motorway
Flashlight Torch
French fries Chips
Potato chips Crisps
Garbage Rubbish
Garbage can Dustbin
Gasoline Petrol
Stand in line Queue
Truck Lorry
Trunk of a car Boot
Hood of a car Bonnet
Convertible top Hood
Pants Trousers
Parking lot Car park
Pencil eraser Rubber
Period (punctuation). Full stop
Watch this on video: https://youtu.be/J1ngsOZUvSo
Next time: Bug off, ya hoser!
Readers: "Something Went Horribly Wrong," features samples of bad writing we see nearly every day. You can participate! Be our duly deputized “grammar police:” Your motto: “To protect and correct.” Send in your photos of store signs, street signs, newspaper headlines, tweets, and so on. It doesn’t have to be a grammatical error. It can be just what we call “cowardly writing.” Include your name and home town so we can credit you properly. You're free to add a comment, although we reserve the right to edit or omit. Now get out there! Send to Eliot@eliotkleinberg.com
Haven’t signed up for our newsletter yet? Do it now! And tell your friends!
NOTE: Eliot and Lou Ann are available for speaking engagements, and can travel. Reach us through the comments section. Just think of all of your employees getting back to work on a Monday, their heads filled with all the ways we’ve shown them to be better communicators!